The Bangkok Post.

The front page mimics that of home: CHECHAN MILITANTS STORM SOUTHERN RUSSIA.

A swathe of pages later, more pertinent news:

" DEAF MUTE STEALS PHONE TO FUND SEX
Phnom Penh - Cambodian police, baffled as to why a deaf mute man would steal a telephone, soon found their answer when a witness led them to the phone in a local pawnbroker's shop and they then found the culprit in a nearby brothel, authorities said yesterday.
Police chief for Toul Sangke commune in Phnom Penh, Khat Darasi, said victim Ear Bunnarith, 40, reported his mobile phone stolen on tuesday and had named the culprit as a profoundly deaf man known only as Bun, 27.
'But neither the police nor the victim could understand why Bun would steal a telephone as he could cannot speak or hear. He had been friends with Ear Bunnarith for many years without doing any wrong before.' Khat Darasi said.
'It was not until a motorbike taxi driver came forward and told us where he had taken Bun after the phone disappeared that we realised he might not be able to use a telephone, but he is human. He stole the phone to buy love.'
Khat Darasi said the victim had declined to press charges against Bun after the phone, which he had pawned for 410 baht, was returned, and Bun was realeased after promising to find more appropriate means to fund his love life in the future. "

" MONK PUTS LUCKY FACE ON WATCH
Bangkok - A Buddhist monk said yesterday he had launched a line of wrist watches, their faces emblazoned with his image and embedded with a powerful magic charm, to protect his follower's from the nation's increasingly chaotic traffic.
Venerable Keat Chanthuch said he had been motivated to create the designer watches after a series of fatal bus crashes on the busy road that links his municipality to the capital.
'The idea came about when some of my students told me they respected me so much that they would ike to wear watches blessed by me and with my picture on them. I obliged, and some of those students where subsequently involved in a bus crash from which they were the only survivors,' Keat Chantuch said. "

At 20 baht, fold-out, with the sheer impractical size of The Australian, The Bangkok Post is an essential read.